Ichimawashi

Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

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Dedicated to the "We're Gonna Sing!" thread.
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Four rikishi were removed from the ring
They were told they had to sing
Onosho, your voice gives me joy
You are such a handsome boy
But ain't no one else gonna be The King!

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35 minutes ago, orandashoho said:

I presume this is quadruple posted in error?

Four different limericks.

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Oh. Oops. Sorry, I didn't realize ...oops. Doing it again. Me and my big mouth.

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4 minutes ago, orandashoho said:

Oh. Oops. Sorry, I didn't realize ...oops. Doing it again. Me and my big mouth.

lol...... Maybe my limericks weren't different enough or maybe I should have put them all in one post.  That might have helped.  (Trying to let you off the hook). 

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Posted (edited)

"There once was a transgender in sumo
The Kyokai found out & screamed, "Oh no!"
Threw him out on his butt
Saying, "You are a nut,
Take your non-binary friend and go!"

The ex-rikishi & friend were sad
They felt they had both been had
"Why does traditional
Always mean conditional
Hell, let's just go & join GLAAD!"

Edited by sumojoann

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13 hours ago, sumojoann said:

"There once was a transgender in sumo
The Kyokai found out & screamed, "Oh no!"
Threw him out on his butt
Saying, "You are a nut,
Take your non-binary friend and go!"

The ex-rikish & friend were sad
They felt they had both been had
"Why does traditional
Always mean conditional
Hell, let's just go & join GLAAD!"

I had never heard of GLAAD. Somehow I'll bet they're monitoring the sumo forum conversation on the topic of your poem, and now perhaps the Limerick thread, as well!

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Hey, Shonanzakura retired!
His “will-to-lose” finally expired
Will we see him again?
Probability: ten!
When Abema calls he’ll soon be hired

He’ll be looking for something to do
Get him on to a commenting crew!
With his youthful good looks
If he talks like he cooks
This could be a life-changing breakthrough!

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It's an intai for Shonanzakura,

His sumo was free of bravura,

He'll make use of his hobby,

cooking fried foods and nabe,

And open "Hattori Tempura".

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4 hours ago, Yamanashi said:

It's an intai for Shonanzakura,

His sumo was free of bravura,

He'll make use of his hobby,

cooking fried foods and nabe,

And open "Hattori Tempura".

LOL............. I almost choked on my Coke when I read "Hattori Tempura"!

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Shonanzakura is intai

Sure does make me want to cry

Consecutive losses

Upset the bosses

Lose & lose, so long, bye-bye!

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Shonansakura will soon be gone

Lose or lose, he kept on keeping on

The wins were a fluke

The losses made him puke

Now cook up some nabe and wonton!

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Shonansakura woke up one morn

Sick & tired of everyone's scorn

This is a good day-a

To quit the heya

Do you think he might get into porn?

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Shonanzakura was the worst

His sumo career was truly cursed

He wasn't a boozer

Just a tall skinny loser

So sad to see his bubble burst.

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Shonanzakura was the worst in sumo

Everyone said he's gotta go!

His wins were few

His losses grew

So he ain't gonna do it no mo'!

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4 hours ago, sumojoann said:

Shonanzakura is intai

 

4 hours ago, sumojoann said:

Shonansakura will soon be gone

 

1 hour ago, sumojoann said:

Shonansakura woke up one morn

 

1 hour ago, sumojoann said:

Shonanzakura was the worst

 

1 hour ago, sumojoann said:

Shonanzakura was the worst in sumo

Don't worry, he's leaving and can't hurt you anymore.(Consoling...)

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Posted (edited)

Sumo lost a fan favorite

So quickly we barely can savor it

If I were the chooser 

Of the next lovable loser

Moriurara is my man for it

Edited by Churaumi
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Kudos to the banzuke makers

For they are the movers and shakers

After drinking much sake

Went with three sekiwake

For most GTB players -  heartbreakers!

 

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A short tale that would fit on a page
Has caused some to erupt in a rage
'These novellas', they plead
'Are just too much to read
Start a new thread and get this offstage!'

A sad sign of this temporal blip
"Don't you dare make me read or I'll flip!"
Hey there, video head:
This just has to be said:
You might look ahead, scroll down, and skip. 

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Beware the guy with nothing to say
Who just can't seem to keep it that way
He'll go way off topic
With views so myopic
And then do it again every day.

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There's frequently a bumbling nerd
Whose posts are usually absurd.
"Ignore User"s for him
But check him on a whim
And then you can just flip him the bird.

Edited by Asojima
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