Ichimawashi

Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

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I find Raja Pradhan quite impressive
About sumo he's clearly obsessive
A tenor in voice
But he's quite a good choice
Concise and not overexpressive
 

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There aren't many rhymes for Mihara
(Che Guevara and sauce carbonara)
He was born in L.A.
But I think we can say
When it ends Ross will say "sayonara"
 

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There's something that always goes wrong
From higashi, nishi, all day long
A quick foot sweep is seen
To get the shikiri-sen clean
Even dirtier now -- bang a gong!

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Posted (edited)

When Asanoyama went out
There wasn't that much of a shout;
But after he lied
And the falsehood was spied,
He finds his career's up the spout.

Edited by orandashoho
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L'affaire Asanoyama is stunning,

Much too serious for us to be punning,

Yet we all just can't help it,

That Sunaku bar -- we'll Yelp it,

While waiting for word from John Gunning

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The Ozeki Corps -- heavens above!

Asanoyama will soon get the shove,

The Kaiju's going up,

Takakeisho's still a pup,

And now Shodai's the one all Moms love!

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Explanation by Asanoyama:
”Just an uncomfortable pajama
The insomnia bouts…
I just had to go out
Never meant to cause all of this drama.”

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A rikishi goes into some bars

That enjoy the arrival of stars

There was heavy drinking

Man, what was he thinking?

He was easily spotted, from Mars

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Failing ozeki out to get some fun
If only he had a wife or a hon!
But a hon couldn't stop that reprobate Abi
Shaming the very heart of all that wabi-sabi
Sanctimonious sumo pride, go burn in the sun!

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There's that gentleman from Ramat Gan
Well versed in all things Rising Sun
Should he not post
We'd surely be lost
And man, his poetry's fun :-)

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An ozeki who visits a hostess

When the Kyokai's restrictions are mostest 

With money to spend

On his reporter friend

Will end up makushita or less

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Where's the wince emoji? (Thinkingindepth...)

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3 hours ago, Jakusotsu said:

Where's the wince emoji? (Thinkingindepth...)

Don't look at us, you're the moderator.  And I agree with you, but get in line behind the rim-shot emoji, facepalm emoji and groan emoji.(Noddingyes...)

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That one man from Ramat Gan

Doesn't really mind Raja Pradahn

But if he got his wish

Konosuke'd speak English

And NHK would just put him on

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Most observers who watch Mitakeumi,

Think his Ozeki chances are gloomy,

But to real True Believers,

He's an Overachiever,

And they answer their critics "Sosumi"

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Is it time for a basho so soon?
Last I looked we were still in late June
But the banzuke’s out
And that leaves little doubt
Time to get my sleep patterns in tune…

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On 10/06/2021 at 20:07, junsan said:

Failing ozeki out to get some fun
If only he had a wife or a hon!
But a hon couldn't stop that reprobate Abi
Shaming the very heart of all that wabi-sabi
Sanctimonious sumo pride, go burn in the sun!

Is this a sumo-sized limerick?

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13 hours ago, Ichimawashi said:

Is this a sumo-sized limerick?

It's just bakabakashi.

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The basho's not yet in my thoughts
Where I am it's the height of the hots
As I type this I see
It might hit forty-three
And there isn't A/C in these spots

Is that laughter I hear, Ramat Gan?
"Forty-three?  Sweater weather, my man!"
There's usually no way
To predict what you'll say
But here, in a limerick, I can

 

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Sekitori each think there's a chance,

They will push through and win the Big Dance,

But over here on the Forum,

It seems there's a quorum,

That everyone's upset with France.

 

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It’s hot: being wrong I just might
But there is nothing wrong with my sight
On the penalty stop
And all five shootout hops
Hugo Lloris jumped all six times right

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You want heat? I can tell you outright

It's not that I'm looking to fight

Throw an egg here outside,

It's immediately fried,

When it's raining I go fly a kite.

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When locking horns with a master

Your brain had better work faster

I didn't expect all the rhymes

About intemperate climes

Foretelling the coming disaster

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I'm wondering who will be kyujo

Maybe Johnny or Moishe or you, Joe

One thing I know,

it's not Hakuhou

He's definitely aiming for yuujo (to be read in a Southern accent).

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5 hours ago, Kintamayama said:

He's definitely aiming for yuujo (to be read in a Southern accent).

You mean like how they talk down in Eilat?B-)

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