Please delete at will

[Treblemaker 254]

Q: How many Marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None: The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

Q: How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself
symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in
a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a cosmos of
nothingness.

Q: How many Orthodox Rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Change?

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE? Because no one
else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even
know the bulb is BURNED OUT. They would sit in this house in the
dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it
out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact
that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS. But
if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS
LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on
to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND
UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT
BULBS CAME IN! WHY?! BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT
THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES
OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE
HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS... I'm sorry...what did
you ask me?

[Igordemorais 75]

This thread needs more Iron Mike

[Fujisan 532]

Seriously guys? This thread is ALIVE??

Well it should certainly continue. It's quite surreal.

Here's some more randomness:

Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.

Please write the line for the forum

With the exception of the computer, what can you hear right now?

What is on the walls of the room you are in?

Does your name make any interesting anagrams?

Is the glass half empty or half full?

What is most important in life?

1 "Bank notes in the boot of a mercedes and a luxury home"

If thats the answer whats the question?

2 A blow heater which is warming my back nicely

3 You tell me..(Paul Sharp)

4 A painting I salvaged showing tree tops and a snowy mountain...

A picture of girlfriend getting drunk shortly before she died..

5 It was half full but it would probably be empty after I knock it all over the floor..I usually do...

6 My faith in Gods promises...