Ichimawashi

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Everything posted by Ichimawashi

  1. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    So if we are destined for a new winner each January basho, that means Shonnanzakura has a chance, in about 2620 or so?
  2. There was a rikishi named Abi Who got tired of old chanko nabe "I shall go out and dine Screw the virus, I'm fine!" Kyokai: "not so fast, Kemosabe!" (Source: someone typed the first line on the Day 3 Mbovo stream and 20 minutes later I had it completed)
  3. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    J'accuse! Kyokai, WTF? This is worse than that banzuke luck Give the yusho away Just 'cause Ikioi can't play Change the matches, Day 15 won't suck
  4. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    Seems a bit minor league to let Tsurugisho win the Juryo yusho thanks to Ikioi's kyujo, without at least making an attempt to rearrange matches around.
  5. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    That’s five matches in six days now for him. He’s basically a welcome mat for anyone injured and in danger of falling off the banzuke completely. 0-9 is a possibility. Soon they will be putting him up against guys with casts or perhaps an opponent in a straitjacket.
  6. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    The 9-man playoff format apparently done the last time this happened (1 bye, 8>4, 1 bye, 4>2, 3-way tomoesen) seems insane to me. A lucky rikishi could get to the 3-way finale without fighting a single bout. Why not just draw lots for the yusho, it wouldn't be much worse? The easiest solution is obviously to draw numbers from 1-9, 1-2-3 are in a tomoesen, 4-5, 6-7, 8-9 are head to heads, reducing to 4 for semifinals. You run the 1-2-3 tomoesen first so the winner can rest while the other three bouts take place. You can even set up a bracket so no redraws are needed. In tournament bridge, my real world job, we have a method of having three teams compete to eliminate one in the same time that others play head-to-head, and many four session knockouts go from 9 to 6 to 4 to 2, the first two rounds being 67% chance to advance. Drawing for a bye is a silly option.
  7. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    Nine man playoff: three tomoesen then a final tomoesen? Or one tomoesen and three head-to-heads leading to four remaining and semifinals?
  8. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    Murray Johnson on the English Day 12 feed mentioned that Goeido, in the domestic broadcasting booth, was having trouble with his hair, because he has no access to the hairdressers and his danpatsushiki has been postponed to 2022 in order to attract spectators and make money. What the phaughck, Kyokai? If you want him to maintain a mage for two years after retirement, send a hairdresser over every few days and pay the damn bills. Or hold the danpatsushiki now and take the loss. This is just plain mean.
  9. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    Hiroshi Morita impersonates Captain Obvious, talking about Daieisho: "if he wins out he is the champion because he is the leader at the moment."
  10. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    All National Football League plays Shall from now on get kimarites "He's out of bounds at the ten, Okuridashi by Glenn, First-and-goal now" the commenter says
  11. Ichimawashi

    2021 "Kozumo" Hatsu Basho discussion thread

    Day 9 and zero kyujo so far among the starting sekitori. Has this happened recently?
  12. Ichimawashi

    Promotion/Demotion and Yusho discussion Hatsu 2021

    Churanoumi at J3w has above him covid-affected guys at J3e, J2w, and J2e. If he makes KK and is normally booked for a rise of a level, but the level above him is filled with rikishi who must not be promoted because of covid, what's the process? Do we have data on this from the last banzuke? Similarly, if somebody goes 11-4 and is usually set to pass 12 or so guys on the way up, do they count the ones who are frozen or not when they decide how far up he goes? Same thing of course happens in reverse: if Sadanoumi from M17e goes 7-8, the J1w slot is open, but with a 6-9, we'd expect him to land in a J2 slot, and there isn't one unless we move the covid guys slightly. Is it even possible that banzuke luck could get one of the covid-frozen promoted by sheer chance?
  13. Ichimawashi

    Ridiculous Predictions January 2021 basho

    Shonanzakura becomes a very new and improved version of Hattorizakura, rebounding from an unsurprising 0-3 start to win three in a row and threaten KK for the first time. There is a bitter dispute in the English press over who receives credit for calling the sudden streak of wins a Bonanzakura. Fans pick up on this new coinage and sing the familiar theme song from the old American TV classic through their masks as Shonanzakura climbs into the ring, and again as he gets down for the tachiai. KK is assured when Shonanzakura's opponent mattas repeatedly, at first with a wry smile, then with uncontrollable laughter. On the fifth attempt, he breaks up again and takes a knee as Shonanzakura touches him on the shoulder, and the gyoji points the gunbai.
  14. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    Kintamayama's fun ISP Is as tough as it ever could be Mita beat Taka-K. Aoiyama? O.K., Now two-thirds could soon be oh-and-three!
  15. Ichimawashi

    Ridiculous Predictions January 2021 basho

    NHK hits upon a winner after Day 1 ends 55 minutes earlier than usual; they pick five matches from the not-so-recent past and replay them during several breaks in the action, starting an internet competition to predict the winners which includes taking votes from the domestic broadcasters (even those not on duty) and the full gang of English-language guys, even the colour guys we have not heard from for a year. Matches are presented with limited information as to the actual basho, year, and day, only the two rikishi are known. Competitors may submit an East or West vote online at any time up until the gyoji completes the announcement of the shikona, and if no vote is received, entrants get a random choice which is 25% East, 25% West, and 50% wrong (whichever wrong is). By Day 15 there are only seven matches left in Juryo and nine in Makuuchi and the video replay matches have been increased to ten. On the English side, Murray Johnson opens an early lead but is passed on Day 10 by John Gunning, and on Day 15 the surprise winner, going 30-0 over the final three days, is that Shapiro guy. An investigation reveals that he has a relative in the video room and the Video Yokozuna Deliberation Council makes John Gunning and Murray Johnson the first two English-language Video Yokozuna. This is bigger news than the basho win by Shodai, but the biggest story is the domestic Video Yokozuna, a female panel member on Abema who says little more than 'ooohh' and 'aaaahh' during the broadcasts and who wins by a large margin, to everyone's surprise, and is quickly cleared of any connection to the secretive NHK department where the replay videos are prepared, leading to much rejoicing.
  16. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    That walking ad down on the floor there Keeps coming back more-er and more-er Twelve or thirteen kanji Blue background, white ‘e’ Are they still plugging Internet Explorer?
  17. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    Hattorizakura’s new name Might release our boy from anti-fame So, Hattori, goodbye... And new Shonan, well, hi! (The suffix ‘zakura’s the same)
  18. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    I dunno if this basho’s worth holding It’s not merely a case of embolding Though it’s all just bad luck A bad outbreak would suck A catastrophe slowly unfolding
  19. Ichimawashi

    Have a go at a Haiku!

    Miyagino now Hakuho eliminates his whole damn heya
  20. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    Hattoizakura's new plan: Matta matta, as long as he can See, big guys in the squat Get quite tired and hot Finally, henka, and down goes his man!
  21. Ichimawashi

    Have a go at a Haiku!

    The COVID vaccine Is transported very cold Santa, can you help?
  22. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    It's good they recycle the names Otherwise we'd not get to the games Yobidashi's turned blue! And the gyoji has, too! You try singing 12-syllable names...
  23. Ichimawashi

    Jingle Balls- 2020 version

    The first one sounded like an early version of BIAB where everything was MIDI and the latest one sounded like a more recent version where it is mostly audio tracks stitched together to make the accompanying track. Anyhow, very well done!
  24. Ichimawashi

    Jingle Balls- 2020 version

    I listened to the first and watched the second and I suspect we are fans of the same software.
  25. Ichimawashi

    Sumo Limericks (in case Haikus are not your thing)

    Limericks that break the rules sometimes are the best...this one is quite well known: There was a young man from JapanWhose limericks never would scan.And when they asked why,He said "I do try!But when I get to the last line I try to fit in as many words as I possibly can." :)