Benevolance

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Everything posted by Benevolance

  1. Benevolance

    Nagoya Basho 2021

    And the Mongolian wrestlers hold an average of 7 yusho each!
  2. Benevolance

    Ikioi retires

    As a moderately-avid Pokemon Go player, I've got about a dozen Hariyama all named for Yokozuna...
  3. Benevolance

    Nagoya Yusho Predictions?

    I'd love to see it, too, because it means that Hakuho made it through a whole basho.
  4. Benevolance

    Preparations of the masses- Nagoya 2021

    Many thanks. I blame a lack of vitamins. Fortunately, these Calbee chips have all the vitamins and nutrients a sumo fan needs! If they're good enough for Takakeisho, they're good enough for me!
  5. Benevolance

    Preparations of the masses- Nagoya 2021

    DIdn't we use to have a thread dedicated to sumo CM? Am I misremembering the term?
  6. Benevolance

    Preparations of the masses- Nagoya 2021

    I went to the department store advertised on Amuru's mawashi back in the day simply because it was on Amuru's mawashi, so the advertising clearly works on weak-minded fools with too much time on their hands.
  7. Benevolance

    Ikioi retires

    Plus look for his upcoming electronica hip hop Enka album "When the Crow Flies" available at fine retailers everywhere.
  8. Benevolance

    Asanoyama caught violating COVID restrictions

    Oh yeah? Well, Asanoyama's mom doesn't understand why anyone could think that a basho for which her darling boy already missed four days wouldn't count as part of his six-basho suspension.
  9. Benevolance

    Preparations of the masses- Nagoya 2021

    No, it's that moment just prior to when the banzuke gets caught violating Covid protocols by hanging out after hours at a local hostess club and it has to lie to the banzuke committee about where it's been and how often.
  10. Benevolance

    Asanoyama caught violating COVID restrictions

    Bit surprised that Asanoyama is still in sumo. The punishment seems a bit light, given the reported efforts he went to covering his tracks and all. And confession time...I've been reading Asahisho's name wrong for years. In my brain he was Asashio, which was why he threw the giant handfuls of salt. I thought he was being punny. But then when the articles were mentioning former-Asashio, and his relation to Asashoryu, and I was confused enough to finally hunt through the DB. It been a tough day, learning that Asahisho wasn't as casually cool as I thought he was. Anyway, props to Asanoyama for helping me sort that one out.
  11. Tag yourself: I'm Great Suffocating Beauty.
  12. Actually, this reminds me of the last time I attended a live sumo event. On this day, we were up in the nose bleeds. Usually, it's all old guys and we'd drink their smuggled moonshine and I'd share my whisky, and I'd tell them how awesome Ikioi is and we'd all cheer him on incoherently. But on this one occasion there was a young couple sitting near us, which was odd, because I thought the minimum requirements to attend a sumo event was 60 years plus or being a foreigner. Anyway, this couple obviously didn't attend or watch sumo regularly, because when we got up into juryo, I finally realized that a lot of their conversation was actually the two of them trying to puzzle out the wrestlers names. And, well, telling me to stop feeding my kid the fish jerky the old men were sharing, which my kid totally did not appreciate being told. When I realized this, I of course dug out my copy of the banzuke from my back pack - written entirely in romaji for dumb foreigners - and gave it over to them! And suddenly their sumo experience improved by at least 3% and years later Japan built a statue for me in Kumamoto to commemorate the event. I mean, the statue doesn't really look a lot like me, and they spelled my name Monkey D Luffy instead of Lance, but it's close enough. I accept their gratitude with a humble heart.
  13. Iut's toutally stiull about sumou, though. Moustly houw frusturating iut caun beu truying tou roumanize wrestlurs.
  14. As your colourful Canadian neighbour, let me speak with candour: I favour adding the extra u.
  15. Benevolance

    Ryuden Scandal

    So what I'm hearing is he'll need just one more scandal and demotion before he can own the title wholly himself.
  16. Benevolance

    Sumo ‘What ifs?’

    I call BS. You can always go to OISHIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!11!111!!!!one!
  17. Benevolance

    Natsu basho 2021

    But extremely likely give his raw powe...ah, I can't even type this with a straight face.
  18. Benevolance

    Natsu basho 2021

    Please tell me it's a condition related to choking.
  19. Benevolance

    Natsu basho 2021

    In the past year, Endo has looked much more like the rikishi he was promised to be. I wonder if he'll get a proper shikona some day soon?
  20. Benevolance

    Ryuden Scandal

    Remember kids: always practice safe yotsu sumo.
  21. Benevolance

    Anomalous Yusho Portraits (trivia)

    Yes! The cross marketing there is brilliant!
  22. Benevolance

    Anomalous Yusho Portraits (trivia)

    In retrospect, it would have been awesome if Hakuho had basically done the exact same yusho portrait, but changed position slightly each time, so that across all 40+ pictures he, like, sees you and waves or something or does the John Travolta look around and wander out thing.
  23. Benevolance

    Natsu basho 2021

    That look on Enho's face when they ruled the match a do-over...
  24. Benevolance

    A Million?

    I didn't read this. I'm not doing this. You can't make me.
  25. Benevolance

    Natsu basho 2021

    He will be promoted all the way to Ozeki 1e!