Benevolance

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Everything posted by Benevolance

  1. Benevolance

    Hatsu 2022 discussions (results)

    My boundless pessimism about Mitakeumi's fighting spirit has finally yielded it's intended results, catapulting this rikishi to an undeserved ozeki position. I had always pegged Mitakeumi as the next Goeidou, but I think that Shodai stole the position and refuses to give it up. Well, refuses to give it up, but only every other basho.
  2. Benevolance

    Ridiculous Predictions Hatsu 2022

    Ex-Harumafuji dons the pikachu mascot costume and re-enters sumo under the shikona Pikachu Libre. The sumo association tries to object, but after several failed legal challenges, they cannot stop him. Pikachu Libre soon rises to the rank of yokozuna, dominating the opposition with his lightning quick Pikachu-non-henka. The children of the world rejoice.
  3. Benevolance

    Hatsu 2022 discussions (results)

    Thankfully Mitakeumi has a record of making these ozeki promotion decisions easy for the committee and his eventual 11-4 won't please the fishmongers.
  4. Benevolance

    Hatsu 2022 discussions (results)

    Nintendo should have provided everyone within throwing distance soft, squishy pokeballs to lob. Missed opportunity.
  5. Benevolance

    Pokemon collabs with Sumo

    Okay, but how do we order copies of the banners?
  6. Benevolance

    Hatsu 2022 discussions (results)

    Someone should direct Isegahama to the Ridiculous Predictions thread.
  7. Benevolance

    Hatsu 2022 discussions (results)

    I see they've gone with the Ground-type gym, per usual. It won't give either Terunofuji (fighting type) or Pikachu (electric type) an advantage due to terrain, so it's a respectable choice. Kind of cool that the last pic previews the Ryōgoku Kokugikan Gym badge.
  8. Benevolance

    Sumo ‘Ranfurly Shield’ for 2022

    The only way I fathom it being broken is if the holder of the shield in the previous tournament did not participate in the following tournament, either because of injury or retirement. Otherwise, if the holder withdraws, his opponent gets the fusen win and the shield moves on.
  9. Benevolance

    Sumo ‘Ranfurly Shield’ for 2022

    Oh, hey. Seiyashi! Asojima said to tell you that you should track the shield ownership across all of sumo history.
  10. Benevolance

    Hakuho certified as 5x Guinness World Record holder

    It was a mix up at the karaoke bar. They called the front desk to order more beer and the World Record judges were delivered instead. Honest mistake when you've have a few pints and an American Express Platinum Visa card: Membership changes everything. This has been a paid advertisement.
  11. It was kind of lost in the YDC report on rikishi and degeiko that there were some other revisions proposed to help improve the technical side of sumo. Foremost among them, the YDC wants to introduce a Gatcha element to honbasho. Sumotori will be given one free Move Capsule each day of the tournament. This Move Capsule will contain one 'winning move' that they're permitted to use; defeating an opponent with a move other than the one designated results in a do-over. Additional Move Capsules can be purchased for 100Y each, but to acquire favourites like yorikiri, oshidashi and the dreaded henka, rikishi or their supporters will need to purchase the Premium Move Capsules, valued at 1,000Y each. Premium Move Capsules may also contain special events like "What Mono-ii?" and "The Gyoji is Clearly Blind" to help provide an edge in close bouts, and epic cards like, "Araiso oyakata, with a folding chair, in the parking garage" to help guarantee those Fusen wins.
  12. Benevolance

    YDC proposes additional changes

    We're only one more global pandemic away from the kyokai becoming a full-on subsidiary of Nintendo (TM). Then we'll have an elder standing on either side of the ring and shouting commands at the rikishi. Shohozan, use Thrust! Shimanoumi, Dodge!
  13. Benevolance

    YDC convenes after Kyushu 2021

    The YDC was arguing about Hakuho's sumo for about an hour before someone pointed out he wasn't active anymore.
  14. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    If Takakeisho and Terunofuji end up in another playoff, that'll be kinda awesome. Edit: Like, it's already happened several times. And if it becomes their 'thing' I'd be totally okay with that.
  15. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    Inside scoop is that he faked an illness to avoid shimpan duties so that Shohozan couldn't tackle him on the sidelines.
  16. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    I suspect it'll be the AshHo era.
  17. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    Shohozan looks like a man whose spirit is willing, but his body won't keep up.
  18. If they did that, I could totally compete in the Tour de France. Assuming I could get my preferred yotsu grip on a decent cyclist, of course.
  19. Benevolance

    Ridiculous Predictions Kyushu 2021

    Shodai shows up with a legit tachi-ai.
  20. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    Shout out to Kotoeko for having such a nice mawashi colour. I find it so soothing. Maybe he finds it soothing, too, which is why he's got no fight in him?
  21. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    And 10 wins starts his tsuna run.
  22. Benevolance

    Ridiculous Predictions Kyushu 2021

    Shohozan, spotting moto-Goeidou sitting ringside, ignores his opponent at the tachi-ai, and instead charges out of the ring and tackles the former ozeki, losing the match but winning the hearts and minds of everyone, everywhere.
  23. Benevolance

    Ridiculous Predictions Kyushu 2021

    Endo doesn't show up on time for his match on day one. Thinking quickly, Tobizaru grabs his Endo Butt Pillow (TM) and, tying it under his mawashi, wrestles in Endo's place. Nobody notices. Or maybe nobody cares. Endozaru wins. The ladies swoon.
  24. Benevolance

    Kyushu 2021 discussion

    And usually a 300+ cushion of posts before you actually get to current spoilers. For some reason, I thought yesterday was the start of the basho, probably because last year the start coincided with the daylight savings time change. I was sad. But I got an extra hour of sleep, so it's a well-rested sadness.
  25. Perhaps they could try and work in 角番 to the deshi shikona somehow?