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  1. 14 points
    Hi SF members, It's been a long time since I was last here - back some time in 2010 by the looks of things. I can see from a couple of threads that there are many old faces here (at least by the shikona), which is great. I fist joined in 2004 and became a Moderator here, primarily based on my interest in and knowledge of amateur sumo in Japan and around the world. I had a brief career as an amateur sumo athlete, probably from 2007-2011, with the highlight of representing my country and region at the sumo competition of the 2009 World Games in Kaohsiung, Taiwan. I think I last competed in 2014, at the Oceania Sumo Championships. I completed a PhD thesis on the international spread of amateur sumo in 2009, with final completion and conferment of my doctorate in 2010. I'd already started working full time, had a young daughter, and very little time to commit to Sumo Forum or even sumo at all. Without the luxury of being able to have SF open on my computer all the time at work, like I did when I was at university, my ability to post and maintain a presence here fell away and I dropped off into inactivity. I wasn't able to easily keep up with the news basho after basho, and my links with amateur sumo became sporadic. Recently, I've been reinvigorated by John Gunning, and with my country (New Zealand) currently in a lockdown due to COVID-19 and that I only work part-time at the moment, I decided to venture in again. I look forward to getting back up to speed with what's been happening in the past decade, much of which I'll be completely ignorant about. Please forgive any naïve comments or old stories that I write. Yoroshiku, Howard
  2. 11 points
    It is remarkable how some have become so knowledgeable about public health, national health systems, and national laboratory systems in a few short weeks. I would like to suggest that anyone who states that the relatively low rate of testing in Japan is a "strategy" has no understanding of Japanese health systems and capabilities or even health systems in general. It would be the same as stating that the lack of testing in California is a "strategy". The lack of testing in Japan has been a lack of capacity, period. Many have been working extensively on this since January but to this point the ability to conduct a large number of automated tests is not possible. It's great to point to South Korea and say why didn't Japan (or any other county for that matter) have a system that could conduct a large volume of tests but the simple fact is that South Korea instituted a system post-SARS that allowed them to do this. Should other countries have done the same? Yes, but they didn't. Again, the limited testing is not a national "strategy" and suggest that it is an intentional strategy is false. Apraxin is precisely on target that the true impact of Covid-19 will not be known for years, just like the H1N1 virus as the data now is incomplete and will likely never be known exactly. Oh, and before anyone suggests that Japan declined one million free tests from Softbank's CEO (which was later rescinded) the reason is they wouldn't have been able to process them. A lack of laboratory capacity. Japan is in the same shape as a lot of other countries at the moment, uncertainty over how this will progress and trying to figure out the best way to mitigate the impact while preserving human life given the constraints of their medical system, supply chain, and how the epidemic is presenting in their country. I am reluctant to comment further as some will want to believe whatever they want to no matter what. I would simply hope that all will try to comply as best as possible with whatever their local health authorities suggest/demand and keep themselves, their families, and fellow citizens safe.
  3. 10 points
    Lyrics Mushrooms are generally not okay, but enoki mushrooms are just about fine - Toyohibiki Mistakenly said "Furoshiki" (wrapping cloth) as "Pirozhki" (Russian baked bun) - Gagamaru I want my daughter to learn piano or violin - Chiyotairyu Didn't see any koalas during his studies in Australia - Ishiura The only horror movie that he's able to watch is Casper - Ichinojo Really spoils the cat that lives at their heya - Sokokurai The animal he refers to himself as is a capybara - Chiyootori Raw fish is okay but grilled fish is not - Hidenoumi Eats onions everyday to maintain a good health - Hokutofuji Broke an iphone screen with his elbow while sleeping - Daishomaru Decided that he should get up at 5:20 every morning - Arawashi Older brother has been the security guard for Mongolia's President - Kyokushuho Real name is "Tatsu" (達), shikona is also a single Kanji character (輝) - Kagayaki Hobbies include table tennis, pool (billiards) and basketball - Chiyoshoma Fell in love with Japanese enka thanks to the cable TV in his family's sushi restaurant - Ikioi Has eaten 20 boiled eggs in a day - Myogiryu Older sister is a radio DJ - Takanoiwa Favourite team is Tokyo Yakult Swallows (baseball) - Sadanoumi Could have been a dentist in Georgia, a hard-worker - Tochinoshin Looks at terrace houses when he can't sleep - Takekaze His name sounds like takarakuji (lottery), but he's never bought one - Takarafuji Inherited a traditional shikona from the Edo Period - Nishikigi Received a letter from a male fan with the fan's contact details - Chiyonokuni Although he's strong, he's recently become addicted to SNoW (Japanese pop singer) - Shohozan Grandmother's name is Masayo Shodai (正代 正代) - Shodai Eats 3 onigiri (rice balls) and 8 bread for snack - Kotoyuki If he were to eat sausage, then he would choose Schau-Essen - Yoshikaze He has a dachshund at home, he himself is shy - Endo When asked "mountain or river?", he answered "mountain" (yama) - Aoiyama Because he likes watermelon ice bars, he always has the convenience store's stock information - Kaisei Smells of Yunker energy drinks prior to his bouts - Tochiozan Before coming to Japan, he worked in a tyre factory - Tamawashi The baseball player he resembles is Yamakawa from Saitama Seibu Lions - Mitakeumi Sneaks to the refrigerator at night and opens it, looking inside - Okinoumi His shoe size was 32cm back in Middle School, so the slippers were too small - Takayasu His mobile phone screen is the same as the default one - Terunofuji He can't drink alcohol at all, he'll even get drunk eating Narazuke Pickles - Kotoshogiku He's eaten Mapo Harusame Noodles four times in his life - Kisenosato His mum recently achieved her highest score on Disney Tsum Tsum (a puzzle game) - Goeido His guide to romance is Winter Sonata (a South Korean drama series) - Hakuho He looks like a dog, so his nickname is 'Wan Wan' (Woof Woof) - Kakuryu The first song he learned in Japan is "Shingo Mama no Oha Rock" - Harumafuji
  4. 7 points
    Those in focus who started to train for Natsu Takakeisho started today o o Enho yesterday o Asanoyama trains for the 3rd day now - lending his chest to the young ones o oo he can't go to the gym any more o o yesterday o
  5. 7 points
    Don't know if this has been posted before, but found a video where two guys in Tokyo made a song about all 46 beya (in 2018), one beya per line, and they've also included an interesting fact about each one. They even took the time to do a short yokozuna dohyo-iri in front of every beya! I've translated the lyrics beneath the video. Lyrics Two minutes from the Kokugikan - Michinoku One touch (on the button) and the door opens - Kasugano Diagonally across from a bus stop - Izutsu In front of you is a one-way street - Dewanoumi A rental apartment is above it - Tokitsukaze This is Asakayama Air conditioning in the training hall - Kise There's a karaoke room - Oguruma Five teppo pillars - Takadagawa One minute from Kiyosumi-shirakawa Station - Shikoroyama Diagonally across from a park - Otake This is Nishikido Octagonal glass window on the door - Hakkaku (hakkaku = eight corners) In front of you is a Summit supermarket - Kataonami Right besides a coffee shop, in front of you is an izakaya - Takasago Watched over by Chiyonofuji (a statue) - Kokonoe A lot of yoghurt, Kotooshu is the trainer - Naruto The first rikishi from Mongolia, Kyokutenho's Tomozuna Plenty of facilities in the underground gym - Isegahama Right next to Arakawa River, in front of a greengrocer - Yamahibiki Moved to the Higashisuna District - Takanohana A furnished bike shop - Miyagino Entering through ALSOK security - Chiganoura I fell in love with the gate - Fujishima Located in Sugamo - Isenoumi This is Tamanoi Kenagakawa River in front of it - Sakaigawa Undergoing renovation - Oitekaze Entrance is on the second floor - Nakagawa 8-chome 8-8 (address) - Onoe You can get the mail right away - Shibatayama This is Minezaki Beautiful two-storey concrete building - Irumagawa For some reason it looks like a hotel - Minato Tsukubamirai City in Ibaraki, a quiet land - Tatsunami Ryugasaki City in Ibaraki is also a quiet place - Shikihide Near an expressway interchange - Onomatsu You can see it after going down a slope - Nishonoseki A new building in Shibamata in the Katsushika District - Azumazeki The most rikishi, made by "Koto"s - Sadogatake The closest to convenience stores - Asahiyama Three traffic lights from the station - Tagonoura The traffic is surprisingly as heavy as before - Kagamiyama Just off the main street - Musashigawa Still under construction, I'm thrilled - Nishiiwa Raising a cat, and doing a photo album of it - Arashio Filled with sweat and tears, the beyas of sumo All 46 are fascinating, the beyas of sumo I want to vist them, the beyas of sumo Let's watch Ozumo
  6. 7 points
  7. 7 points
    I have some extra time now that I'm stuck at home so I cut together a bunch of Kintamayama videos to make a Goeido Kubinage highlight reel. Gonna miss the champion of Kubinage
  8. 6 points
    NHK breaking news - May basho is postponed by two weeks to be held in May - June if all things go well.
  9. 6 points
    Araiso yesterday had a lonely entrance ceremony to Waseda university. The general one was canceled due to you-know-what. http://www.sponichi.co.jp/sports/news/2020/04/02/kiji/20200401s00005000417000c.html with his instructor Hirata
  10. 6 points
    Hello all, here are the kimarite statistics for all divisions in this most unusual basho, which ended with a not-so-unusual Makuuchi yusho winner as Yokozuna Hakuho took his 44th title. Full marks to the Kyokai for managing to hold the basho at all. Nankairiki might have lost out on the Sandanme yusho to his junior stablemate Ura, but as a consolation prize he did chalk up the 17th uchimuso win of his career. No video of that one, unfortunately, but it does draw him level with Futagodake for most uchimuso (in the available records, of course). Matsuda reached double figures on Day 3 when he recorded the 10th nichonage win of his career, leaving him just one short of Mori's record. Sawada picked up an izori win on the middle Sunday, toppling Hokutosato after being pushed back to the edge of the dohyo. Kizenryu is well known as an uwatenage specialist, collecting a whopping 141 wins with an overarm throw so far. By contrast he rarely wins with an inside grip - this basho he got only the 9th shitatenage win of his career (and the first in nearly six years) with a lovely throw at the edge, turning Ryusei's forward drive against him. Another rikishi moving into double figures in this basho was Urutora, who was in good form for a 5-2 kachi-koshi. Three of those wins came with an ashitori leg grab, taking his career total to 10. Roll your eyes as I recycle the same joke I made a year ago - Osaka gives osakate its maiden appearance of the year. While some rare kimarite appeared in this basho, two others drew a rare blank in Osaka. The basho average for kainahineri has declined from 6 to 4 during the last decade, and this was the 8th basho it hasn't been used in the last six years. Also, it was only the 3rd basho in which kakenage has gone unused. Kimarite from kettei-sen bouts are not included in the statistics. Kimarite Makuuchi Juryo Makushita Sandanme Jonidan Jonokuchi Total Percentage Abisetaoshi 1 2 0 0 3 1 7 0.29% Amiuchi 0 1 0 0 1 0 2 0.08% Ashitori 1 0 0 0 0 3 4 0.16% Chongake 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Fumidashi 0 1 0 0 0 0 1 0.04% Fusen (default) 3 1 2 4 3 1 14 0.57% Gasshohineri 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Hansoku (foul) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Harimanage 0 1 0 0 0 0 1 0.04% Hatakikomi 22 17 41 61 59 7 207 8.44% Hikiotoshi 9 4 15 33 25 7 93 3.79% Hikkake 2 0 1 1 1 0 5 0.20% Ipponzeoi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Isamiashi 0 0 1 2 1 0 4 0.16% Izori 0 0 0 0 0 1 1 0.04% Kainahineri 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kakenage 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kakezori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Katasukashi 4 2 7 8 8 3 32 1.30% Kawazugake 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kekaeshi 0 0 0 0 1 0 1 0.04% Ketaguri 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kimedashi 2 0 1 2 0 1 6 0.24% Kimetaoshi 1 0 0 0 0 0 1 0.04% Kirikaeshi 0 0 1 3 2 0 6 0.24% Komatasukui 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Koshikudake 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Koshinage 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kotehineri 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kotenage 3 2 10 17 7 2 41 1.67% Kozumatori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Kubihineri 0 0 0 0 1 0 1 0.04% Kubinage 0 0 0 2 4 1 7 0.29% Makiotoshi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Mitokorozeme 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Nichonage 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0.04% Nimaigeri 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Okuridashi 9 7 23 24 23 1 87 3.55% Okurigake 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Okurihikiotoshi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Okurinage 1 1 0 0 1 0 3 0.12% Okuritaoshi 2 0 0 3 3 1 9 0.37% Okuritsuridashi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Okuritsuriotoshi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Omata 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Osakate 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0.04% Oshidashi 77 48 95 192 178 39 629 25.64% Oshitaoshi 10 8 12 22 15 7 74 3.02% Sabaori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Sakatottari 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Shitatedashinage 1 0 1 0 3 0 5 0.20% Shitatehineri 1 0 0 0 0 0 1 0.04% Shitatenage 9 3 8 13 26 3 62 2.53% Shumokuzori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Sokubiotoshi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Sotogake 0 0 3 1 1 0 5 0.20% Sotokomata 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Sotomuso 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Sototasukizori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Sukuinage 9 2 8 12 14 3 48 1.96% Susoharai 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Susotori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Tasukizori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Tokkurinage 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Tottari 1 0 0 0 0 0 1 0.04% Tsukaminage 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Tsukidashi 12 2 10 22 9 3 58 2.36% Tsukihiza 0 0 1 1 1 0 3 0.12% Tsukiotoshi 21 13 24 36 27 5 126 5.14% Tsukitaoshi 0 0 0 3 2 2 7 0.29% Tsukite 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0.04% Tsumatori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Tsuridashi 1 0 0 1 0 0 2 0.08% Tsuriotoshi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Tsutaezori 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Uchigake 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0.04% Uchimuso 0 0 0 1 0 0 1 0.04% Ushiromotare 0 1 0 0 0 0 1 0.04% Utchari 0 0 1 1 2 0 4 0.16% Uwatedashinage 3 3 7 4 5 2 24 0.98% Uwatehineri 2 0 0 0 1 0 3 0.12% Uwatenage 17 12 14 23 47 5 118 4.81% Waridashi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Watashikomi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Yaguranage 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Yobimodoshi 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00% Yorikiri 79 68 94 163 195 42 641 26.13% Yoritaoshi 2 9 15 22 49 6 103 4.20% Zubuneri 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.00%
  11. 5 points
    Hello fellow Forum members, This is an introduction to many of you, and a re-introduction to some of you. As you can see from my profile, I used to be quite active in this forum back in the days. During a couple of years in the mid-00s, I maintained a site called hakkeyoi.net - perhaps you could call it a precursor to sumodb.sumogames.de. The site also hosted a few of the games, such as Sekitori-Quad and Sekitori-Oracle. In mid-2006 I went AWOL and suddenly stopped participating in the sumo community. Without going into details, in the summer of 2006 I was kind of depressed mainly due to a faltering career, and sumo didn't seem very important at the time. So I left the online sumo community and stopped maintaining my site. Eventually things turned around for me, but by then I had lost the sumo bug and frankly felt a little awkward about returning to the forum again, considering how I left without notice. I don't know what prompted me to browse sumoforum.net a couple of weeks ago, for the first time in years. I noticed that although the software has changed, all the old posts are still retained, which is fantastic. And many of the old hands are still around. To those of you who wondered what happened to me: please accept my humble apologies for disappearing like that and not getting in touch earlier. I don't plan to be as active as I used to be, but I'll at least take a shot at GTB.
  12. 5 points
    I don't think we really have a thread for this type of news so here it goes for now: Sewanin Torafusuyama has switched to a wakaimonogashira position, so there are 8 of those again. Apparently it's only the second known case of such a switch, the first being Kotochitose in 1991, due to the early retirement of Shishiho. I thought perhaps the Kyokai's office staff/web team were not at work due to lockdown, but someone's managed to make the changes I reported above, so
  13. 5 points
    Arashio oyakata watches over keiko https://www.sponichi.co.jp/sports/news/2020/03/31/kiji/20200330s00005000459000c.html
  14. 5 points
    Yes, I remember Hakuho. Is he any good?
  15. 4 points
    Deaths in Bergamo are apparently far in excess of last year, even with all confirmed coronavirus fatalities removed from the tallies. I wouldn't be surprised if we see something similar to what happened with Swine Flu, where in a couple of years the total death toll gets revised upward, with a little asterisk after the numbers that says something to the effect of 'probably, but we'll never know for sure'.
  16. 3 points
    My page opened at the bottom of the page so I saw the last picture first, my brain thought 'cool, a rikishi with a half body tattoo' before my brain slapped itself...
  17. 3 points
    Lyrics The closest from the Kokugikan - Michinoku The only automatic doors - Kasugano Dewanoumi Looks like a community center - Izutsu Part of a large apartment - Tokitsukaze Just off the main road - Kokonoe A large entrance hall - Takasago Kataonami Hakkaku, it's just behind Nishikido Near an elementary school - Azumazeki Not far from there (Azumazeki) - Tomozuna Miyagino Still under construction - Asakayama A modern building - Kise Borrowing another heya - Tagonoura Not far from a station - Shikoroyama Otake Drying their mawashi belts - Kitanoumi The shutter is currently lowered - Oguruma Takadagawa You can see the ring from outside - Arashio Looks like a rich person's home - Isegahama Asahiyama Used to be Nakamura Beya - Musashigawa In front of it is a pedestrian walkway - Kagamiyama Along the kerb - Matsugane (now Nishonoseki) Among a residential district - Onomatsu Sadogatake Located in Ibaraki Prefecture - Shikihide Not far from Shikihide - Tatsunami Irumagawa Next to a temple - Chiganoura The best atmosphere - Fujishima Isenoumi A large parking lot - Tamanoi There's a river in front of it - Sakaigawa Endo Fever - Oitekaze Soon there'll be an Ichinojo Fever - Minato Minezaki Located in Nakano City - Takanohana Located in the Takaido District (in Suginami, Tokyo) - Shibatayama An undressed concrete building - Onoe Not far from Kawasaki Daishi (Heiken-ji Temple) - Kasugayama (now Nakagawa) Kokugikan, Sumida Yokoami 1-chome (address) Everyone, let's go and watch Ozumo
  18. 3 points
    Considering the logistics of the job, I'd think a window cleaner might get more face slaps than hugs from women. But maybe I'm overthinking this.
  19. 3 points
    https://www.scmp.com/lifestyle/article/3077600/how-baseball-became-national-japanese-pastime-and-spawned-fans-no-other way off-topic, but an excellent read and old photos.
  20. 3 points
    Chris Gould appears to be occupying himself well:
  21. 3 points
    Activity on the Forum has to a certain extent declined, especially since the biz-haru tournament came to an end. I can't help but think that the pandemic is impacting not only the immediate future of oozumo in Japan, but also the lives of Forum members all around the world. Stay safe, fellow fans and friends. Stay home. And post when the spirit moves you.
  22. 3 points
    I worked up a quick translation of the interview highlights: (K = Kitataiiki; I= Iwatomo; N = Nakamura; A = Araiso; G = Goeido) K) Now that you've retired, has your lifestyle changed? N) It sure has. There's nothing to be excited about anymore. K) Does the 15-day basho feel different now that you're an oyakata? N) Completely different. I no longer have a match to think about when I go to bed the night before or wake up each day. I'm now free of the pressure of fighting and way more relaxed. K) Have you lost weight now that you're retired? N) Nope, I'm still maintaining my fighting weight. N) My retirement came about in a completely unexpected fashion due to injury, and similarly, the Hatsu basho yusho by Tokushoryu was completely unexpected. He completely upset the order of winning. A) As a PhD of sumo, didn't you anticipate Tokushoryu winning? N) Not even remotely. A) Me neither--we're disqualified as commentators. A) Since we're commentators now, we should go around to all the heya and try to predict who will win. N) Naw, it's too hard. A) Sorry I suggested it. [At this point, former Goeido enters the room.] I) We're filming for YouTube. G) Is that so? I) But you haven't changed. You said you'd start smiling after you retired. G) I am smiling! G) [Upon it being pointed out that the top button of his dress shirt is unbuttoned] "I just retired and I'm still too fat to button it." A) Give it six months and you'll have 2-3 more cm of room! G) Trying on his official blue oyakata jacket: "It's too small!" Zipping it up, asks: "How does it look?" Everyone) Too Small! [He tries on the next size up and it fits perfectly.] [Back to Nakamura, talking about episodes with Kise during his career] N) During keiko, when called by Kise, I would get fully amped to train with him. A) Most other rikishi wouldn't come at me with full strength, only Yoshikaze. N) That may be true, but if we went 10 times, I was only good for the first 2-3, then I'd be spent, while Kise wouldn't even be breathing hard. A) Even so, my heated training with Nakamura was a big part of the reason I was able to become Ozeki, then Yokozuna. I always used my training with him as a barometer for how I'd do each basho. N) After training with Kise just before the basho, I'd need the remaining time just to recover, so when the basho began, I was always at my peak and ready to take on Joi opponents. A) When I got injured, Nakamura as always the first to call me with helpful advice. A) When I was close to making Yokozuna, Nakamura would always say to me: "Make it happen so I can be your tachimochi." So when I actually made it and he was able to fulfill that role, I felt his words helped me become Yokozuna. N) The sword was so heavy, it left me with sore muscles. A) When the other rikishi gathered to wrap the rope around me for the first time, it was moving that all these guys like Kotoshogiku, Yoshikaze, and Shohozan who were my rivals were there for me. It was the first moment it hit me that I was now a Yokozuna. K) Is there anything you wish you had done while still active? N) No, I did everything I could. But I do wish I could have matched up with Enho. K) Why? N) Because I'm confident I'd win. I liked facing small opponents. For a long time there was no one smaller than me. Then Ishiura and Terutsuyoshi came along and I never lost to them. I figured I'd just do to them what bigger rikishi always did to me and I'd prevail. K) What would be your strategy for facing Enho? N) It wouldn't matter. I'm confident I'd smack him down regardless of what he did! K) If you could be reborn, would you enter sumo again? N) Absolutely! I loved sumo. K) Which rikishi are you focusing on for Osaka? N) I want Tokushoryu to do well and have a performance similar to Hatsu, since all eyes will be on him. A) If he can do that, it would prove he was the real deal. N) I want him to climb up the banzuke. That would light up the sumo world. K) Finally, a message to the viewers. N) Make sure to hit the like button and subscribe!
  23. 2 points
    Giving the reasons for delaying the start of the basho for two weeks, Hakkaku Rijicho said: "We cannot say the situation is improving day by day. While we are aiming to hold a normal basho, we will consider flexibly from all angles, including holding it but at a reduced scale, holding it without spectators, or canceling it." Source
  24. 2 points
    Fumidashi is really just a catch-all term for step-outs not caused by over-aggression (otherwise it would be isamiashi). Nothing suggests that it has to be backwards, apart from the English translation.
  25. 2 points
    And available in record time, not that that's a high bar to clear with my past performances: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1VnH1QuxGBYnEVO2TZ-cl4CMCLgDEdeN_jI3pETC7Vx4/